Moved

I have moved to livejournal.
That's where I can control whichever post that can be read by public and which can be privatized.. More shiok!! Enough of people who got angry without really investigate.. Freedom of speech!! Understand?? This is the only place I talked crap, vent and also share my happiness!! Please!!!
http://mynameissu.livejournal.com

Privatizing my blog

To protect everybody's interest.. I'm going to privatize my blog.. I'm sick and tired when people don't understand the meaning of freedom of speech.. This us the only place that I can vent my anger, frustration, stress, joy and happiness.. Please respect that!! If I don't make a big hooooooo haaaaaaaaaaa about your life or how you manage your stuff.. Please don't make a hooooooo haaaaaaaaaaa about mine!!! Just respect that!!

Please pm me on my facebook if you wish to me to add you in my blog.. Thanks...

A short update

Life have been so stressful.. I'm starting to work soon and I have yet to get any lobang for infant care.. Sigh.. Today I'm going to meet one of the in charge at this childcare centre that provides infant care services.. Hopefully she is able to squeeze in my baby.. Another thing that really bothers my mind is my work.. Hopefully he will rise my pay as per promised..
These days we have been quarreling.. I seriously need help.. I think I'm going thru depression.. The only thing that eases me is to see my baby sleep on my lap or anywhere near me.. However to have my hubby by my side wherever I go is a big bonus.. But I really gate when he failEd to understand my needs and feelings..
Wish me all the best for the infant care..
Okay my baby just finished his milk.. Need to bathe him.. Bye..

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri

First of all, Sue sekeluarga Ingin Memohon maaf sekirenyer we all ADe pernah menyinggung perasaan mane2 pihak yang sengajer Dan yang tak sengajer..
So... Da lame jugak ku meninggalkan blog Ini.. Tapi lame sgt tu tidak la jugak ehk.. Anyway so amacam u all nye Hari Raya celebration? Mesti meriah ehk.. Hmmm.. As for sue, haishhh.... Imagine the day before raya, we quarell again.. Mmg mood untuk raya that time mmg da tk de.. Abeh hubby plak mcm menambahkan kerosene.. Da gitu.. My spine hurt so bad sampai I call my mum.. So mum Turun rumah me to check on me if I'm doing alright.. Kecian my mum.. Sigh.. I also don't know knp hubby n me leh jadi mcm ni..

So first day raya, kite went to my side first... Pasal my bro will be heading to my mum's side first too!!! Hubby told his sister that we will be reaching noon.. He even mentioned the timing around 12plus.. My bro was wearing lime green and we were wearing purplish pink.. But too bad, since I wasn't in mood to raya, we didn't take any family pic for ourselves.. Only my elder bro took pics!! After we seek forgiveness to my parents, we went to the in-laws... Jeng jeng jeng.. As per mentioned, we reached there at around 1230 in the afternoon.. And guess what???? Even we mentioned that we will be reaching there at 12plus, instead of waiting for us, they(in-laws) went out for raya visiting.. And we waited for them at the void deck.. So acam??? Power kape in-law aku.. And poor baby, he had to be fed his milk at the void deck... Ape salahnye tgu jap for us before went for visiting.. Mcm la hari raya ade 1hari jekkk... Mcm da tk de hari lain nk go visiting.. Nk kejarkan kerete yg dpt pinjam?? In the past pun naik public transport per.. Like wth!!! Then bile aku da Kat rumah in-law, guess what?? MIL was like sarcastically asked me on my well being.. I juz nod my head.. Sigh.. Then during the forgiveness part, MIL asked me to change.. She wishes me to put on a smiley face.. Like wth!! I was like that mesti ade sebab per.. Aku je nk berubah abeh diri sendiri pey kesalahan tk tahu.. Gerekzzzz peerrrr!!! Then after the seeking "forgiveness" part, SIL sent us to my granny by car.... Walaupun berkali2 ku tolak.. Well it was raining and she was "worried" for his grandson safety... So ok lor... Malas nk reason out ngan dorang... Frankly I may forgive but never forget.. Aku mmg tk favorite if org tu suro aku berubah tapi diri sendiri mane pey hebat jek.. Aku ni mcm pun pasal diri Kau... I believe there is always a caused for every actions.. How I wish I can have PIL that's outgoing.. Can communicate like friends.. Respect each other feelings.. Even go shopping!!!! Sigh.. Da mmg nasib mcm kentang... So moving on....
Eventho I'm on maternity leave, I have yet to receive my pay yet.. Already SMS my boss but he totally ignore it... Like WTH... So what should I do?? I really malas nk mengadu kat MOM... Haiiiyyooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok enough of bad stuff...
Hopefully tomorrow gonna be a better day.. I'm going to cut my hair super short n highlight it.. Then will be going to pasir ris... Arnold!!! Will be going with hubby n our son... Hopefully it will turn out great!!!

Well that's for all.. Hopefully you guys will have better days than me.. Cheers..

5years of togetherness

So.. If you guys were to refer to my topic of this entry, you guys must be thinking that this gonna be a jovial n happy entry.. Well how I wish this Is a happy entry.. Not even well wished from him.. We had a big fight.. I'm not sure if I can ever be happy in this kinda state.. I'm thinking of my mum well being, my nenek hospitalized, my baby, the house, my thoughts n feeling towards my in laws.. I hate the way she comparing herself n me, I hate the way she uses my mom to comment such things.. I hate the way they make my house as theirs n litter my house.. I hate the way they buy fish n put in the tank without asking if I'm alright with the fish.. I hate the way they said how cute my baby is without asking how am I or even congratulate me.. Nt even one of his family side came n visit us.. Only my mom n dad side was all concern about me.. But there is one bang izhar was all asking about me n well being.. Why is he so different from others.. Infact there are alot more but I refused to pen it down.. Thinking any these makes my head spinning more crazier.. I felt crumbling down.. Sigh... Suddenly I feel like I need a break from everyone.. Whatever it is, I am standing string eventho I cried.. Sigh.. I am not looking forward for this syawal especially going to my in law.. I am sure they just want to see my baby..

16th Ramadan

My Grand-dad left us on the 22nd August 2010.

Haji Supnan Bin Mohd Noor.

A man that the family looked up to.

You will always be in our Memory.

Al- Fatihah

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I'm having PostNatal-Depression symptoms. Hubby and i went thru alot of things this month. As you know, one of it are, my grand-dad just passed away. :(

there are quite a number of things but i shall not say it in here. Cant get too personal. but whatever it is, hubby is being very supportive. Both of us had our breakdowns this month and i had the most... :(

i am trying to stay strong....



My baby. Exactly in a week, he will be turning 1month.. pretty excited.. he is being very cranky these few days.. maybe he is going to turn 1month old and that's why he seeking alot of attention. at the end of the day, by looking at his smile, really eases my pain.



So something to look forward to...
This 30th AUgust, plan to go Geylang to buy all of the other accessories for raya. Will be putting baby @ mak's house after sending him to polyclinic. I so cant wait.. how i wish i can bring baby along.. since baby too small and super fragile, its the best to ask favour from mak to take care of him for awhile..
But on the 1st of Sept, will be heading to KK for baby's appointment and mine.. :)

Well baby is showing some sign that he will be crying.. so i better log out...

a pic that i took earlier.. look so shagged...

Emotional

I just need to vent somewhere.. this gonna be a very emotional entry.. First of all, i would like to apologise to hubby for what i have done yesterday... I am very sorry.. i dont know what came into me.. i was very stressful and feeling down.. seems that problems came up one after another.. I just need to be strong.. i have to stay strong.. everything seems to be so wrong.. i felt so down.. and most of all, i felt soo lost.. attimes hubby tried to do some help but then it turned out so wrong.. maybe it's just me.. with all the problems on my shoulder.. i felt very heavy.. having bad headaches these days.. All i want right now is my son... I just cant live without him.. I love him too dearly.. My heartaches everytime he cries and im not sure what he wants.. but slowly i will learn his needs.. but my hubby... sigh.. with his STUPID work timing that make him work like a DOG, makes him soo far apart with his son.. and i hate it when he tried to make things right but turned out to be so wrong..

what i know...
Tuhan menyambar petir dan hujan kepada kite kerana ader pelangi yang menyinar disebaliknyer..